Did Katie Hopkins Steal From A Food Bank?

Little ray of non-publicity seeking sunshine Katie Hopkins is under a cloud at the moment. The Queen of mock outrage, who has a trombone for a kneecap recently visited a Food Bank in Devon with the aim of belittling “the feckless” scroungers who use it.

She lambasted a legless man for wasting the nation’s resources by buying trousers saying, “This is why the country is going to the dogs. If legless people can afford trousers then something is seriously wrong.”

A kerfuffle then ensued with a woman waiting at a nearby bus stop. For the #34 to Tiverton.

“My arse she’s waiting for a bus!” said Katie to the handily located camera, “She is probably a prostitute. She looks like one. And she is hanging about. All adds up.”

PHWOAR!!!!!

It was when Katie left the Food bank to assail a nearby roundabout for being round, that staff noticed a number of tins of marrow fat peas were missing.

An insider told Gfb newshound, Cindy Etch-a-Sketch, “Katie had just finished a frenzied sex session with Nigel Farage and needed to replenish her energy levels with marrow fat peas which you can only get at Food Banks these days. She will send a cheque to cover the cost. He is lucky. Katie normally eats the male after copulation.”

Duncan-Spliff ‘avin it laaarge…..

If you have any spare tins of marrow fat peas why not send them to Katie!

 

 

 

 

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British Politics – Nonsense For A Purpose – An Occasional Series

There was contrived amazement in the Papers about the Racist (UKIP) Party’s  minor success in fooling morons to vote for them on the basis of ignorance, fear and lies, laced with false bonhomie, a pint of ale and a cigarette. The Party’s leader and chief chap, Nigel “I’m Not Sitting Next To You Darkie” Farage has returned to his cowpat to figure out what to say on tiptoe about the election results for the European Parliament.

Nigel used to work in the City of London as a trader.  He is a chap. He doesn’t like foreigners. Or the poor. Or the educated. Or the tolerant.

 

“The Bigger The Lie”

As previously reported by Gfb, the Prime Minister and Deputy Prime Minister are a pair of bollocks, whilst the Leader of the Opposition is a dick.

 

They’re In It Together!

These shots were passed to Gfb by Emrie Self-Assembly, who happened across Rupert Murdoch taking off his underpants after a hard day’s undermining the democratic process. Murdoch was heard to say, “How ya doing down there boys? Still wanna fuck with me? Nothing like a shaved scrotum for comfort is there!”

If anyone thinks the Press is giving so much attention to UKIP because of plans to curb a Newspaper’s ability to hack the phone of  murdered children they are naive fools.

Hi! My Name Is Ed Minibellend

It really is a load of bollocks!

Gawd ‘elp us! Nonsense For a Purpose Indeed

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Sochi 2014 Winter Olympics – Ginger Sooty’s Update – Day 5

Ginger Sooty, GLOVE PUPPET OF DREAMS provides a daily round-up of events at the Sochi 2014 Winter Olympics that are, quite simply Sochi 2014.

Well Folks –  What A Day!

This bloke from somewhere slid faster than another bloke from somewhere and won the sliding along/down/across on frozen water.

Britain’s highlight of the day was watching Tories splutter as their political heartland sank under the floods. As one Gay UKIP wag may have said, “It is God’s curse on us for allowing women bishops!”

We saw this fella in the Ski Jimp and thought. Mmmmm…..Russia……Revolution……bearded Marxist……yes folks……..IT’S LEAPING LENIN!

The Great Leap forward!

A couple of sports to look out for.

1. Octogenarian Testicle Slalom –  The stretchy tessies elderly gentlemen possess! The record slalom from a standing point is 17 gates and 23o feet of sac unfurled.

Favourite is 104 year old Kano Sackorollo from Japan who made world headlines this week  after an emergency occurred on board his plane to Sochi. The emergency slides  failed to activate and Kano rolled out his scrotum to allow passengers to glide (after taking their shoes off naturally) to safety.

Expect (non) stiff competition from Spain’s Manuel Cardosa who hires his knackers out as a marquee!

2. The Nuns From The Sound Of Music Lesbian Lover Lust – On Ice!  –  The world’s greatest ice based lesbian team sport makes its debut at the games. Favourites are the Australian team of Bull Dyke bus drivers, but expect a plucky performance by the crack team from Venezuela.

I know I will be glued to the TV as they seek to sort out Maria’s Problem!

Enjoy The Games!

Sooty

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