Happy Birthday Prince George

We may be a bit late but Happy Birthday to our future King! On bended knee we salute thee……

Nice to see the goatee coming on and the hillbilly look beginning to take shape…..

 

Baby Prince George, is of course the fruit of sexual intercourse between our Kate and Wills,

The Bearded Prince

Miranda Soup-Slurper, Royal Correspondent for It’s Bollox magazine said,  “I still can’t believe that Kate has had sexual intercourse, such is her fragrant fragrance.  Also royal babies come from a place much more shiny and lovely than the Earth. My guess is a planet made of cuddles and souvenir tea towels.”

Phillip Utopian-Fallopian, keeper of the Royal Sock, told GFB, “Ms Soup-Slurper is wrong. Prince George came from Waitrose along with a free cup of coffee.”

 

 

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When Bob’s On The Pot He Likes to Read A Lot (It’s A Man Thing!)

Hello,

I don’t know about you but this Horsemeat story has taken my by surprise.

I love a ready meal. Proper British grub and you know what you are eating ‘cos it says so on the packet –  unlike cooking in kitchens! Who knows what they are adding to our food.  Herbs and the like.

My dear wife Shirley bought some Snake and Kidney pies and Dog Sausages in Tesco’s last week – sadly all the cat fritters had sold out.  The look on her face as she slopped the grub into me trough with the a loving, “Get that into yer, ya useless slob.”  There’s still love there.  Somewhere. Maybe.

As a treat she dished up Budgiemasu, an avian variant on the Italian classic pudding. Tasty if feathery.

There I am breakfast, lunch and dinner scoffing this nosh, happy as a pig in  shit – well you are what you eat as my deranged Uncle Vince used to say from his cell.

All the salt in this stuff did cause a touch of constipation,  so it was a pleasure this morning to finally reacquaint myself with the smallest room. Passing that hoof was tricky though.

Now I’m off to saddle up me Findus cottage pie!

Laters.

Bob

You can read more of Bob’s musings whilst on the pot here and here. Your lives will be infinitely richer for doing so.

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