Ginger Mysticism – The Mystic Milkman

I am Barry Belcher. I am a Milkman. I am Psychic. I have been predicting predictions, with various degrees of accuracy for a number of years now.  Previous predictions can be read here.

I am up with the Lark, delivering milk, eggs, orange juice, potatoes, bread (wholemeal mostly but the occasional white sliced) and yoghurt. I like yoghurt. Do you?

So, without further ado…….Milk Bottle of Mystery…….what does the future foretell?

1. March 2015 – Agatha Christie will emerge from a Chrysalis which is attached to a large Rubber Plant in a Doctor’s surgery in Swindon to publish 35 more Poirot novels.

2. December 2012 – A man with hairy knees will emerge as a threat to world peace. Possible Frenchie.  The signals are weak at the moment.

3. April 2016 –  The Queen will choke to death on a Scotch Egg in a Harvester in Billericay, whilst watching the final of Dancing Ice Ninnies. Luckily The Pope will be on hand to offer last rites, which may cause a bit of a problem in the after life.

Will these prove accurate readers? Only time will tell………

Now it is time for messages from “THE OTHER SIDE” –

Mandros, Cyprus,

It’s under the oven.

Hanif in Karachi

Imran wants you to know that New Kids On The Block are better than N’Sync.

Liang Bo in Shanghai

Bo Bing thinks you left the bedroom light on.

Shirley in Chippenham

Sidney wants to let you know that he is fine and doesn’t blame you for leaving the fish bones in.

IF YOU KNOW ANYONE WHO MAY BENEFIT FROM HEARING THESE MESSAGES PLEASE PASS THEM ON….

Well folks, the Milk Bottle of Mystery is being returned to the Crate of Destiny.

Until next time……….

Read Full Post »

Ginger Mysticism – With The Mystic Milkman

I am Barry Belcher. I am a Milkman. I am Psychic. I have been predicting predictions, with various degrees of accuracy for a number of years now.  Previous predictions can be read here.

I am up with the Lark, delivering milk in my hometown of Devizes. I also deliver eggs, orange juice, potatoes, bread (wholemeal mostly but the occasional white sliced) and yoghurt. I used to deliver babies as well. Not any more though. Political correctness gone mad in my opinion.

So, without further ado…….Milk Bottle of Mystery…….what does the future foretell?

1. Cous cous will become the carbohydrate of choice for the discerning.

2. Vowels will be banned in France to save money.

3. At least 48% of Barry Manilow will melt in the Spring.

4. Prince Harry will get his todger out. Again.

Will these prove accurate readers? Only time will tell………

Now it is time for messages from “THE OTHER SIDE” –

Francoise, Paris,

Papa says you always look lovely in Bleu!

Hanif in Karachi

Imran wants to let you know that the Asif borrowed his puncture repair kit and still has it. Nip round there and get it off the thieving dog.

Liang Bo in Shanghai

Bo Bing thinks you left the back door open.

Norman in Totnes

Maureen wants to let you know that she is fine and doesn’t blame you for running over the cat last year. And her come to that.

IF YOU KNOW ANYONE WHO MAY BENEFIT FROM HEARING THESE MESSAGES PLEASE PASS THEM ON….

Well folks, the Milk Bottle of Mystery is being returned to the Crate of Destiny.

Until next time……….

Read Full Post »