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Hello,

The Olympics have started. We hope you enjoyed the opening ceremony (we didn’t have a clue either) and will enjoy the sports fest that is, quite simply London 2012.

We can’t compete with the media terms of reporting the unfurling drama that is, quite simply London 2012.

Ginger Sooty will be searching out the stories that go under the radar, the stealth stories. Athletes’ heartache, joy, sadness and all the striving that they have striven for in order to achieve their goal of achieving their goal. For this is quite simply London 2012.

So Ginger Sooty, GLOVE PUPPET OF DREAMS, where should we be looking for glory in these Olympics?

Hello everyone, Ginger Sooty here. Can’t believe the Olympics have finally started. Did you see Paul McCartney last night? Is he now made of wax? Macca mate, you are a legend – no need to coat yourself in formaldehyde!

Anyway there are a couple of sports I think you should look out for today.

1. Formation Immolation – Led by three-time world immolation champion, Ash Smoulder, Team GB has a real medal chance in this event. Despite feeling a little burned out after the qualification round, Ash is confident of victory, if he can reform in time. If he wins he will set the country alight! (as well as himself).

2. Pillow Dribble Staining – The Central Asian Republic of Tyzkiastan will grind to a halt at 3 pm (GMT) when the country’s greatest athlete and legendary Pillow Dribble Stainer, Olga Bonjelarenko goes for her fifth succesive Olympic Gold.

Blessed with a saliva so toxic, that the tongues of potential suitors have to be sheathed in lead, Bonjelarenko is hoping to repeat her performance in Beijing where the stain on her pillow remains visible from Outer Space.

Enjoy The Games! Sooty.

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