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Posts Tagged ‘Painting’

Hello Folks

My name is Terry Cotter. I’m a Potter.

I have been potterising for nearly two decades now. I stock a wide range of ceramic goods in my shop down here in Lower Swell.

Here are some reviews of some of my favourite bits from the world they call “Art”.

1. Art  

The Triumph of Death – Brueghal’s masterpiece – Boy oh Boy are those skeletons miffed!

2. Movies

Noah – Gladiator builds an Ark and it rains a lot – goes on for 40 days and 40 nights.

russell 3 copy

A Plague Of Sausages Doth Descend

3. Music

Lana Del Ray – Ultraviolence – One of the songs goes  “la la la de de de de la la la” –  another goes – “de dum de dum de dum de dum ooh!” – another goes “Tum ti tum tum tum” – goes on a bit.

4. Literature

Murder on the Orient Express – Agatha Christie’s famous whodunit – Poirot on the train to Syria (Was he Jihadist?) has to solve an onboard murder – what do you think? Of course he does! Goes on a bit (with the lead pipe in the buffet).

Village News

Good News! The Village notice board has been painted!

Until next time……keep those wheels a spinning!

TCTP

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The great man enjoying a drag on his breadcrumbed fish fag!

No wonder all his faces were a bit wonky.

By The End He Was On 20 A Day

During His Fish Period

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The Scream by Munch (pronounced Munk, not Munch as in chomping on a cheese sandwich).

As Brian Banning-Order commented, “The Scream is the cream of the crop when it comes to paintings of people holding their heads and screaming.”

 

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Ginger Is A State Of Mind

Warhol. One word. One man.

“Ginger Wigs”.

A collection of Ginger Wigs. Wigs that are Ginger.

So brave. So challenging. So daring. So-da Stream.

 

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Hello Folks

My name is Terry Cotter. I’m a Potter.

I have been potterising for nearly two decades now. I stock a wide range of ceramic goods in my shop down here in Lower Swell.

Here are some reviews of some of my favourite bits from the world they call “Art”.

1. Painting

The Mona Lisa – Da Vinci’s masterpiece – I too knew a girl called Lisa who moaned a lot.

The Original Version!

The Original Version!

He Painted It – But Without A Yorkshire Pudding On His Head

2. Movies

Transformers – erm…..erm…..sorry……nope not a clue – why does it go on a bit?

3. Music

Beethoven’s 7th – it begins with; dum de dum dum dum de dum – goes on a bit thereafter.

4. Dance

The Nutcracker – Heavy hammed lads in tights and cod pieces go – PRANCE – PRANCE – LEAP! – Then thin birds in miniskirts go tippy toe -tippy toe – stand still – TWIRL!  – none of this has anything to do with nuts – which always confuses me.

PS What is a Potter’s favourite song?  Kiln Me Softly!

Village News

Whoever stole the Village notice board please return it.

Until next time……keep those wheels a spinning!

TCTP

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Many of you will be aware of President George W Bush’s love of painting despite the fact that they can only be described as shite.

Did he draw inspiration from the famous Fresco restoration of Cecilia Giminez on Ecce Homo in The Sanctuary of Mercy Church near Zaragoza?

Her handiwork was described as “A crayon sketch of a very hairy monkey in an ill-fitting tunic.”

Do George and Cecilia share the same brush technique?

painting of putin
Whaddya think?

The Resemblance Is Uncanny!

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Hello,

My name is Terry Cotter. I’m a potter.

I have been potterising for over 20 years and stock a wide range of ceramic goods in my shop The Potter’s Reel, down here in Lower Swell. The shop is named after my potter’s wheel which goes round and round. Like a reel.

Here are reviews of some of my favourite bits from the world they call “Art”.

1. Painting

Water Lilies – Monet’s famous work. He was an Impressionist. I do impressions. Gwyneth Paltrow and Laurence Olivier are my best ones. Close your eyes and it is as if they are in the room with you.

2. Movies – GravityBollock and Cloney star in this film about  wonky goings on in space. Lacked a bit of atmosphere  – Tipped for Oscar glory though – Goes on a bit.

3. Music – Chopin Piano Sonatas – Plinky plonky plink. Plonkety, Plonkety, Plink. That’s the gist of it – Goes on a bit.

4. Ballet – Swan Lake  –  Lads with big thighs bounce around the stage for no apparent reason, whilst thin girls go tippy toe, tippy toe, tip tip tippy toe – again for no apparent reason Goes on a bit.

5. Opera – Turandot – Hefty lads and lasses warble about something. In a foreign language! Then a really big unit warbles really loudly for another bit. Then it ends. Goes on a bit.

Village News

The Vicar’s rash has cleared up thanks to the liberal application of Calamine lotion and abstinence from fornication.

‘Til next time – The Wheel Keeps On Turning!

TCTP

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