Posted in Beauty Tips, Food, Funny, Humor, Humour, Satire, Show Business, tagged Canada, Crosswords, England, Funny, Humor, Humour, Idiocy, Overcoming Adversity, Relationship Breakups, Self Help, Surviving Depression, Teeth, USA on January 8, 2015| 9 Comments »
Ello Hoily,
Can you help? I am doing a crossword and I am stuck on 6 across.
The clue is “Things we chew our food with located in our mouths.” It has 5 letters and so far I have TE_TH – I am stumped. Any ideas?
Slow Dave, Hull
Dave,
The word I’m thinking of is tongue. It may not fit the crossword but I find it can fit just about anywhere else. Once you discover this fact for yourself your crossword will be totally redundant. Enjoy.
Oily
Posted in Africa, Funny, Humor, Humour, Satire, UK, tagged Afghanistan, Australia, Black Humour, Canada, Humor, Humour, Indonesia, Iraq, Navy SEALS, News, Overcoming Adversity, Satire, Self Esteem, Soldiers, Speical Forces, Swimming, Terrorism, The SAS, the War On Terror, Torture Techniques, UK, USA, Veruccas, War on May 28, 2014| 16 Comments »
Hello,
The best way to crack a terrorist? Veruccas.
I learned to love and cherish my veruccas. Not only were they a food source they also made steadfast companions. Easy to look after and not requiring sustenance apart from a sweaty sock or two, they make the perfect pet for us special forces types.
Terrorists cannot cope with Verucca Boarding. Whenever I whipped out my verucca sock and placed it on the nose of an evil terrorist – Boy oh Boy would that evil terrorist spill the beans.
Even beans he didn’t know about.
Think of it compadre – would YOU like an infestation of these little critters on the end of your conk? Thought not!
The technique was invented by Colonel Jock “McJock” Bollocks who headed up the deep cover Fungal Foot Fighting Force. Jock once took out an Iraqi machine gun nest armed only with a can of Athlete’s Foot spray and a belief in the redemptive qualities of Jesus Christ.
Legend or loon – you decide!
Now in civvy street when I go to the local baths for a swim, I think of all my little verucca chums nestling around the pool’s edge waiting to be called to defend our freedoms.
Thank you Colonel Bollocks.
Posted in Animals, Food, Funny, Humor, Humour, Random Thoughts, Satire, UK, tagged Apple Pie, Death, Dogs, England, Funny, Humor, Humour, Loss, News, Overcoming Adversity, Pastys, Pets, Pies, Satire, Surveys, UK, USA on May 8, 2014| 33 Comments »
Imagine you own a dog called Rover, Fido, Barney or something else. One day you are out walking your dog and throw a ball or stick or body part for the mutt to chase and return. Sadly you forget your arm strength and the object lands in the deep undergrowth. Dog runs into said undergrowth in a show of canine fidelity. Cur never returns.
You are heartbroken and confused. What happened to your dog? What happened to your ball, stick or body part? To which there is no answer. You are bereft. How can you replace such a loyal, steadfast, slobber chopped companion?
Simple! With a pie!
Could This Be The Family Pet Of The Future?
Gingerfightback conducted an opinion poll in a pie shop in east London to find out which pie would make the best pet. Not surprisingly Apple Pie came out top. But savoury pies took most of the top positions! We asked Professor Alfred T. Damp-Patch, Professor of Advanced Cobblers at the University of Salamanca for his views and he told us, “Really? How interesting. I’m allergic to short crust pastry. Where’s the bar?” 
gingerfightback.wordpress.com 