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Posts Tagged ‘Obama’

Hello Folks!

If you missed Ginger Sooty’s last report on the US Election you can read it here!

Governor Romney finally came out of his room dressed as a coconut and proclaimed to the people in the key election State of Canada, “I am a coconut. You too can be a coconut if you vote for me on the 6th!” He was led away by a man who had a stethoscope in one hand and an enormous syringe in the other.

The President was in the key election state of London. He boasted today that Volcano output in the US had increased massively because of his polices. Olava Care in particular.

Sarah Palin’s Thought Of The Day – Sarah wants to encourage Grizzly Bears to reduce their carbon footprint by chopping their paws off.

Today’s Great Ginger Wig Of The Office Of The President Of The United States.

Bill Clinton – the sexual capacity of Kennedy, the intellectual rigour of Roosevelt and the amiability of Reagan. Boy he loved to have his horn blown. Made an arse of himself. A lot. Probably still does. His wife scare the bejesus out of us.

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Hello Folks!

If you missed Ginger Sooty’s last report on the US Election you can read it here!

Governor Romney refused to come out of his  room today. He told me through his hotel door that he is convinced that Ninja Goldfish Attack Death Squads have been sent to asassinaytetetey him.

The President was in the key election state of  Brazil and announced a major new initiative to turn around the USA’s fortunes through the reintroduction of 80’s Girl Groups. Obananarama Care.

Sarah Palin’s Thought of The Day – She’s had one! Ban cows mooing.

Today’s Great Ginger Wig Of The Office Of The President Of The United States.

Ronald Reagan – Amiable buffoon, lampooned in Europe as a brainless oaf but venerated in the USA for being a brainless oaf. Had a very strong aversion to eels. Could read what he was told to read like no other, but never learnt to tie up his own shoe laces. Ended the Cold War. Britain only managed a Cod War. but what is a consonant between friends!

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Hello Folks!

If you missed Ginger Sooty’s last report on the US Election you can read it here!

Hello Everyone

Governor Romney offered me a lift in his car today. “You can be strapped onto the roof and keep ma dawg cumpaknee!” he offered. He is a nice man. 47% of him is made of leather.

The President was in the key election state of Florida and announced a major new initiative to turn around the USA’s fortunes through Choral productions of Grease in every town with a population over 5,000 souls. Oramalamadingdong Care.

Sarah Palin’s Thought of The Day – Nearly had one!

Today’s Great Ginger Wig Of The Office Of The President Of The United States.

John Fitzgerald Kennedy – Told West Germany “I am a sausage” and they still loved him! Hopped a lot as a child.  Camelot, Jacqui, Hope and then slain in Dallas by about 254 assassins all standing on a Grassy Knoll. Had a bad back. Lots of Irish households still possess ashtrays with his face on. Invented the Etch A Sketch.  Had an incredibly square head.

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Hello!

If you missed Ginger Sooty’s last report on the US Election you can read it here!

Governor Romney recently toured the key election state of Colorado. He announced a new plan to boost jobs and growth in America by offering generous tax breaks for deep-sea nose hair exploration.

“Nose hair has a great future. I keep mine in a jar. Gonna frack ’em. Wanna see?” He told bemused onlookers.

The President also toured the key election state of Colorado. He announced a major new initiative to turn around the USA’s fortunes through a mass conversion to Buddhism. Okarma Care.

Sarah Palin’s Thought Of The Day – We thought she was thinking, but it turned out to be a spot of trapped wind.

Today’s Great Ginger Wig Of The Office Of The President Of The United States.

#3 Theodore Roosevelt – Big Lad. The Teddy Bear was named after him. Used to beat dissenters with the limbs of Filipinos. Wasn’t in the best of health when he died. Ears made of wheat.

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Hello,

With Bill Clinton on the stump, we have unearthed several remarkable photos showing how Monica’s Lewinsky’s dress complete with spill, became haute couture amongst the great and the good a few years ago.

You couldn’t make it up! (But we did) You can see yesterday’s here!

Is that Queenie Liz wearing Monica’s Dress?

As Judith Chalmers said at the time,”Her Majesty is particularly suited to this azure print and that little splash of white sets it orf luvverly.”

 

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If you missed Ginger Sooty’s first report on the US Election you can read it here!

The election for the next President of the US is only a few days away and Gfb has sent ace reporter Ginger Sooty to cover it.

Hello Everyone

Governor Romney has toured the key election state of Florida, where he had a meaningful conversation with an orange and squeezed a satsuma in a provocative manner. His hair was very shiny, dare I say….. lustrous?

The President also toured the key election state of Florida. He announced a major new initiative which will use Andean pack animals as a sustainable transportation system. Ollama Care.

Sarah Palin’s Thought Of The Day – Sorry, nothing doin’ today! 

Today’s Great Ginger Wig Of The Office Of The President Of The United States.

#2 Abraham Lincoln – Big Lad. Wore a big hat. If you want to get ahead wear a hat. Famed for his Gettysburg Address. Don’t know why,as it was just 1265 Maple Avenue, Gettysburg, PA.

Slain by an assassin.

Some people have asked Why Sooty?

Here he is debating US Foreign Policy recently;

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The United States of America is a big place. It stretches from here all the way to over there and then down a bit. It’s a bit windy at the moment.

The election for the next President of the US is only a few days away.

This is how it works.

MONEY.

LOTS OF IT!

Then;

The winning candidate must secure a majority of Electoral College votes. The Electoral College also has evening classes in basic car maintenance, conversational Spanish and food hygiene.

Gfb has sent our ace reporter Sooty, now fully fluffed and stitched after his mammoth Olympic Reportage, to bring you the inside story on how the election race is progressing.

Hello Everyone

Last week I was following Governor Romney as he toured the key election state of Ohio. He said to one person “Women are great aren’t they! My wife is a woman and she should know!” Whilst to another he said “Cheese is at the top of my agenda. Yes sirree, right up there alongside hair tonic.”

Earlier in the week I followed The President as he toured the key election state of Ohio. He announced a major new initiative to turn around the USA’s fortunes through intensive punctuation. Ocomma Care.

Sarah Palin’s Thought of The Day

We are happy to announce that Pea Tarty doyen Sarah “Im” Palin is, for a small stipend, letting us in on her thought processes.

Today Sarah wants to ban the chewing of meat on Thursdays.

You are no doubt aware of the Great Seal of The Office Of The President Of The United States. Well for the first time, we are allowed to bring you pictures of the Great Ginger Wig Of The Office Of The President Of The United States.

George Washington – wore a wig and had big buckles on his shoes. 38% gravel. Had a great fear of wood. In all its evil forms.

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Recently we brought damning proof of Mitt Romney’s secret backers which you can see here. All I will say is that I knew the Osmonds were up to something.

Gingerfightback’s top reporter Once Ginger Sooty, has captured another amazing shot.

It shows the evil, spotty genius who, FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE is behind Obama’s attempts to cling on to the Presidency. JOSEF STALIN!

Proof that the Pea Tarty was right all along – OBAMA is a COMMIE BASTARD!

Where’s He Russian Off To?

Wake Up America before this is your new National Anthem!

Thank You Once Again, Once Ginger Sooty!

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Gingerfightback’s top reporter Once Ginger Sooty,  captured a rare image yesterday whilst covering the US Presidential Election.

It is not in the same league as “The Grassy Knoll” or even “Deepthroat” but it does show the evil, twisted genius who is behind Ritt Momney’s attempts to become the next President.

If Donny is around, where are Marie, Wayne, Merrill, Alan, Jay and oh fuck no Little Jimmy?

They want the world and they want it NOW!

OSMONDIA is upon us………It will be a fight to the death. Well, if not to the death at least to the Dentists.

Someone Help Him, Help Him Pleeeease…….

Be careful America or you national anthem may soon be………

Thank You Once Ginger Sooty For Bringing This To Our Attention!

We Need More Like Him

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Ailing French President, “Tricky” Nicky Sarkozy has played a dastardly final card in his increasingly desperate bid to cling to power in France.

BANNING GINGERS!

As he trails bitter rival Francois Hollande in les polls, the titchy titular head of the 5th Republic has expanded his recent decision to force Gingers into Burkhas by completely banning them from French life.

A World Without Gingers….

In a rally outside a Boules Court in Brittany, Sarkozy, standing on a box said, “Frere Jacques, Sur la Pont D’Avignon, le Tour d’Eiffel, creme fraiche, hoh he hon. C’est les merdes Gingers whoez isez toez blamez pour mon predicamon!”

To gasps from his ball chucking audience he then blurted, “Sacere bleu! Non ces soir Josephine, Maginot Line! Avez vous une cuppa? Onions.”

Why Give This Man A Platform?

 

Last year, Gfb’s France correspondent Gael Force-Winds revealed the imposition of Burkhas on Gingers by Sarko.

Sarkozy’s comments put him at odds with President Barack Obama who, in a speech in Grimsby this month, said that the U.S. prized freedom of hair colour: ‘We. Are not.  Going to tell people what colour. Their hair. Should be.’

He Is A Red!

A Typical Frenchman 
 
 

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