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Posts Tagged ‘Modern Life’

Aunty Bill - A Tin Opener Short

Dear AB,

I am helping my girlfriend with her maths homework. We are stuck on 6×3 –
she says it is 247 and I think it is 63.

Which of us is right?

Shane, Sydney, Oz

Shane,

Take the square root of 6. Divide this by the number times you ever see three buses all of the same number and colour on the same route on the same day (this bit is important – they must be the same colour or the equation won’t work).

Sub divide by the number of Pot Noodles you and your girlfriend have eaten in the last week.

Add the two numbers together and subtract the number of times you’ve said the words “One Direction are changing the way we think about popular music in a post modernist society”.

If you’ve followed the above correctly the answer should be 12.

Good luck!

Aunty Bill

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Crikey!

The wonderful and brilliant lass from ooop North via Canada, Catherine Johnson (read her brilliant words HERE!) asked for a Sausagey Update of classic film Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

Thought of the Child Catcher (still scares the you know what out of me) Toot Sweets and even pondered The Old Bamboo but plumped for Chitty, Dick, Sally Anne and those two squeaky kids.

Obviously Dick had to be given the biggest sausage and we think his work in CCBB was only surpassed by Diagnosis Murder.

dvd

IS THERE ANYBODY OR ANYTHING YOU WOULD SAUSAGED? FEEL FREE TO PASS ON YOUR WISH!

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