Arts World – Terry Cotter The Potter

Hello,

My name is Terry Cotter. I’m a potter.

I have been potterising for over 20 years and stock a wide range of ceramic goods in my shop The Potter’s Reel, down here in Lower Swell. The shop is named after my potter’s wheel which goes round and round. Like a reel. Some Art reviews….

1. Painting

The Lady of Shalott – Waterhouse’s Pre-Raphaelite painting of a woman in a canoe without a paddle.  She can’t have got very far! In fact she was probably up Sh*t creek. Wonder what happened to the Post-Raphaelites?

2. Movies

Braveheart  – Mel Gibson daubed in woad dons a dress and says, “Wee Jock McTavish, Och Aye The Noo, Bagpipes, Shortbread, Haggis, Cobber” and other terms of Jockery – shouts “FREEEEDUUUUM!” then has his innards removed by a bloke in a cap – Goes on a wee bit.

3. Music

Led Zeppelin 2 – Hobbit Lovin’ Cock Rockers Love Muscle Removal Van? Sounds good to me – lots of songs about having their lemons being squeezed – must have been Pancake day when they recorded it – Goes on a bit.

4. Literature

War Horse – Michael Morpurgo’s moving novel about a horse that goes to war. Goes on a bit.

5.Pottery

Protogeometric Style of Ancient Greece

My favourite period of Greek Pottery – it represents the return of craft production after the collapse of the Mycenaean Palace culture and is one of the few modes of artistic expression of this era known to us. By 1050 BC life in the Greek peninsula became sufficiently settled to allow a marked improvement in the production of earthenware. The style is confined to the rendering of circles, triangles, wavy lines and arcs, but placed with evident consideration and notable dexterity, probably aided by compass’ and multiple brush.

I’m going on a bit aren’t I…..and yes, I looked this up on Wikipedia.

Village News

The Village shop’s the new frozen foods section will be opened by Brad and Angelina on Saturday. Angelina has had, “Your daily shopping needs at your local Spar” tattooed on her left shoulder.

‘Til next time – The Wheel Keeps On Turning!

TCTP

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John Travolta In “Saturday Night Fever Disco Chicken” (Again)

The 70’s Classic……..A disco dancing chicken and a whole lot more…..apparently Led Zeppelin were going to write the sound track. But didn’t.

 

 

 

 

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Arts Review – Terry Cotter The Potter

Our arts correspondent Terry Cotter The Potter and his unique insight into the world they call “Art”.

Terry recently took up underwater pottery.  Tricky but rewarding.

Hello,

My name is Terry Cotter. I’m a potter.

I have been potterising for over 20 years and stock a wide range of ceramic goods in my shop The Potter’s Reel, down here in Lower Swell. The shop is named after my potter’s wheel which goes round and round. Like a reel.

1. Painting

The Lady of Shalott – Waterhouse’s peerless Pre-Raphaelite painting of a woman in a canoe without a paddle.  She can’t have got very far! In fact she was probably up Sh*t creek. Wonder what happened to the Post-Raphaelites?

2. Movies

Braveheart  – Mel Gibson daubed in woad dons a dress and says, “Wee Jock McTavish, Och Aye The Noo, Bagpipes, Shortbread, Haggis, Cobber” and other terms of Jockery – shouts “FREEEEDUUUUM!” then has his innards removed by a bloke in a cap – Goes on a wee bit.

3. Music

Led Zeppelin 2 – Too lazy to think of an album name why not, Hobbit Lovin’ Cock Rockers Love Muscle Removal Van? Sounds good to me – lots of songs about having their lemons being squeezed – must have been Pancake day when they recorded it – Goes on a bit.

4. Literature

Philip Roth – American Pastoral – This fella’s daughter goes a bit wonky and blows some people up. He goes a bit wonky as a result, gets cancer but doesn’t blow anybody up. Which is a relief. Goes on a bit.

5.Pottery

Protogeometric Style of Ancient Greece

My favourite period of Greek Pottery – it represents the return of craft production after the collapse of the Mycenaean Palace culture. Indeed, it is one of the few modes of artistic expression besides jewelry in this period since the sculpture, monumental architecture and mural painting of this era are unknown to us. Yet by 1050 BC life in the Greek peninsula seems to have become sufficiently settled to allow a marked improvement in the production of earthenware. The style is confined to the rendering of circles, triangles, wavy lines and arcs, but placed with evident consideration and notable dexterity, probably aided by compass’ and multiple brush.

I’m going on a bit aren’t I…..and yes, I looked this up on Wikipedia.

Village News

The village shop’s the new frozen foods section will be opened by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie on Saturday. Angelina is so honoured she’s had, “Get all you daily shopping needs down at your local Spar” tattooed on her left shoulder.

‘Til next time – The Wheel Keeps On Turning!

TCTP

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Simon Cowell’s No Direction – New Hard Rock Direction?

Britain’s top Boy Band, No Direction, have revealed to Gfb that their new single  “Whole Lotta Gove” is set for release next week. The song, a reworking of the Led Zeppelin classic cock rocker is a paean to the extraordinary talents of the Education Secretary Michael “Something Odd About Him”Gove, seen here drumming with the band recently.

“Yoo need Schoolin’……”

The band are currently recording their new album, “Blame The Poor – They Smell“. The album will feature a clutch of new songs including;

Fresh Vegetables Scare Northerners

All In It Together? Mugs!

Life In The Faslane (Trident Mix)

Love Me Love My Bedroom Tax

Near And Farage (The Petty Bigot Mix)

When I’m 97 (I Can Retire)

Climate Change Denier Stomp – (Ft MC Fracker)

To Be A Jeremy Hunt (Cockney Rhyming Slang Mix)

Whole Lotta Gove

For Those About To Be A Workshy Single Parent With A Foreign Name In A Gay Marriage We Salute You (2015 Election Strategy Anthem)

As David “Pitt The Closure” Cameron explained, “This Long Player is going to be our best yet, we’ve even got MC Obama playing his Drones!” There’s a crease in my scrotum Fotheringham.”

George “Charlie Up De ‘Ooter” Osborne, simply sneered and said “Prole.”

The band’s manager Simon Cowell, who has recently confirmed that the Queen’s left buttock features a tattoo of him told us, “This album is so good that my nose fell off when I first heard it. Really. Wanna buy a watch?”

He Is

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