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Posts Tagged ‘Films’

Nothing can replace the Big Screen in terms of excitement, magic and bigness. But we have noticed something odd. No chickens.

Sharks, horses, monkeys, turtles, dolphins, Jeez Louise even Ants have had films made about them. But Chickens? Only Chicken Run. No chicken road movies, chicken lurve, no chicken coming of age stories, not even a chicken in a war movie. Chick flick? me arse. A poultry effort.

Until now – Black Chicken Down

Ridley Scott’s powerful drama set in the mean streets of Mogadishwasher. Can Chopper Chicken rescue the soldiers trapped in this hell hole?

“You’ll believe a chicken can fly” – The Times

“The most realistic portrayal of chickens in war I have ever seen” – The Delaware Doubter

“Chopper Chicken is already a movie legend” – The Sydney Morning Glory

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Gingerfightback can reveal that Sergio Leone originally called “The Man With No Name”  – “The Man With A Sausage On His Hat”.

We are glad that Sergio changed his mind…..

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The Sausage Spaghetti Western Trilogy;

A Fistful Of Sausages

For A Few Sausages More

The Good The Bad And The Sausage

And here is the original poster for A Fistful of Chickens.

The Chick With No Name

The Chick With No Name

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Hello,

Gingerfightback’s film critic Mark Commode, has discovered that the central character in the Rise of the Planet of the Apes – Caesar  – was originally going to be Ginger as the film’s producers believed it would make the whole thing more realistic.

 

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Ginger and ever so angry

The next instalment, provisionally titled, “Early Morning On The Planet Of The Apes – Kippers for Breakfast” will feature a spectacular bicycle  chase  modelled on the attached outtake from, “Late Afternoon On The Planet Of The Apes – Not So Warm When The Sun Goes In Is It?”

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In case you wanted to know Chicken Hammer in ancient Norse is – Kaða Mjölnir – impress your friends with this knowledge. (Before asking we couldn’t find the ancient Norse for sausage – if anyone knows what it is, keep it to yourself please).

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Hello,

My name is Terry Cotter. I’m a potter.

I have been potterising for over 20 years and stock a wide range of ceramic goods in my shop The Potter’s Reel, down here in Lower Swell. The shop is named after my potter’s wheel which goes round and round. Like a reel.

Here are some reviews of some of my favourite bits from the world they call “Art”.

1. Poetry

The Rime Of The Ancient Mariner – Coleridge’s classic – Bloke in a boat kills a big bird and gets thirsty. Goes on a bit

2. Musical

Annie – Little ginger girl warbles in an orphanage – I wish it had been Tomorrow when I saw it – Goes on a bit.

3. Movies

King Kong – Big Monkey gets the hump, climbs the Empire State Building – falls off.

4. Literature

Sophie’s Choice – William Styron’s novel – Sophie has to make a decision!- Goes on a bit.

Village News

There are is a new shopping trolley in Spar. At last.

‘Til next time – The Wheel Keeps On Turning!

TCTP

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Hello,

This week we have been celebrating some of the tough guys on the silver screen. Here is a picture of legendary Belgian, Jean Claude Van Damme with a flan on his noggin from the infamous movies, “Mullet Massacre II – This Time It’s Personal”.

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Here is a still from his 1984 outing, “The Renegade Sock – Kick Him In The Bollox”. JCVD is pictured with his co-star The Ginger Mussel – so it really is a case of The Mussel’s From Brussels! (Ho Ho).

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Here are some other images.

Bruce Lee in a fight with Chuck Norris from Bruce’s last film, “The Way Of The Sausage”. Bruce wears his sausage throughout the movie. Why Chuck has got a Scone on his head is anybody’s guess.

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Here is Chuck in the Kung Fu remake of Pride and Prejudice,”Die Hard For A Bit One Man War Gone Rogue Miss Bennett,” Pt 2 The Revenge. 

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Here Is Steven Seagal Wearing A Chinstrap

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No oil painting is he!

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Hello,

We present the following, admittedly grainy image of Kung Fu legend Bruce Lee in a fight with Chuck Norris.

It is from Bruce’s last film, “The Way Of The Sausage”. The still is from the denouement of the film in which Bruce thwarts a gang of Chinese Triads who are up to no good. He retains the sausage with perfect balance throughout.

Why Chuck has got a Scone on his head is anybody’s guess.

sausage

So upset was Chuck at Bruce’s death that in every film he has made since he wears a sausage in Bruce’s honour. Here is Chuck in a Kung Fu remake of Pride and Prejudice called, “Die Hard For A Bit One Man War Gone Rogue Miss Bennett,” Pt 2 The Revenge. 

chuck norris copy

Here Is Steven Seagal Wearing A Chinstrap

seagal

No oil painting is he!

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