Tony Blair Calls On The USA To Bomb Scotland

Narcissistic loon Tony Blair has called upon President Obama to bomb Glasgow as he is convinced the Islamic State has gained a foothold in the land of the Kilted.

As he told GFB,

“I was with the Chairs of RBS, Barclays, BP and Halliburton explaining how to create the conditions for peace via slaughter, when I was handed a dossier entitled “Al-Alex Salmond Plans to introduce Deep Fried Islam to Scotland.” It’s all true because the dossier came in a nice plastic folder and had some pictures in it. One showed the Glasgow Rangers ground with a bloke with a beard sitting in one of the seats. What more proof do you need?”

Is He An Islamist?

So, I called me old muckers Bill Clinton and George W to see if the Yanks could strike and y’know what? They never returned my call! Me! After all I’ve done for America!

Didn’t bother with Obama – never liked fellas who are rational.

But mark my words – Scotland will be the next Islamist bolthole.”

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Tony Blair Wants To Bomb His Local Indian Restaurant After Dodgy Chicken Tikka Masala

 

Narcissistic loon Tony Blair has called for his local Curry House to be bombed after the Chicken Tikka Masala he’d ordered turned out to be “Dodgy”.

As he told GFB,

“I was with the Chairs of Goldman Sachs, EXXON and Halliburton outlining my plans for peace in the Middle East by bombing the shite out of the place.  Only bombing will bring about the long-lasting peace we in the West deserve. Mass slaughter will open their eyes to my genius.

The curry turns up and the chicken was a ropey.  The owners are Bengali and Muslim – after all I have done for Muslims!  So I got on the blower to the RAF to order them to launch a few Sidewinders into the “Passage To India”.

“They told to me to “Fuck Off You Nutter!”

Me! Tony!

So, I called me old muckers Bill Clinton and George W to see if the Yanks could strike and y’know what? They never returned my call! Me! After all I’ve done for America!

There’s always Vladimir – he’s a chum now – especially as I am considering being a peace envoy for Ukraine – worth a few bob that gig.

As I said 10 years ago. History will be my judge. For without me there would be no peace in Iraq today. Does anybody know where a good curry house is though?”

“Cos We’re Worth It!”

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Monica Lewinsky’s Dress Resurfaces!

 As always GFB has its finger on the pulse of breaking news stories. About 18 months ago we ran a world exclusive on how her famous blue  dress (with stain inlay) had been picked up by a number of the most famous people in the world.

 

Ever one to exploit a opportunity here are those images again. Like Monica, I “deeply regret” her triste with Bill. Never been the same since. It played havoc with my corns.

 

Hilary – Blue Is Her Colour

 

Mother Theresa – Who Would Have Thought?

God Bless Yer Ma’am!

Isn’t Bill a scamp!

 

 

 

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Look Who Is Wearing Monica Lewinsky’s Dress!

Hilary? Good Lord! The things people will do to put a spark back into a marriage!

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Is That John Paul II Wearing Monica Lewinsky’s Dress?

Hello,

With Bill Clinton on the stump, we have unearthed several remarkable photos showing how Monica’s Lewinsky’s dress complete with spill, became haute couture amongst the great and the good a few years ago.

You couldn’t make it up! (But we did) You can see Queen Elizabeth’s here!

Is that Pope John Paul II wearing Monica’s Dress? Santa Maria! – what a load of cassocks.

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Look Who Is Wearing Monica Lewinsky’s Dress!

Hello,

With Bill Clinton on the stump for Obama we have unearthed several remarkable photos showing how popular Monica’s Lewinsky’s dress complete with spill, became amongst the great and the good a few years ago.

You couldn’t make it up! (But we did)

Is that Mahmoud Have-I-Had-Me-Dinner-Yet? President of Iran wearing Monica’s Dress?

Lovely Legs

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