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Posts Tagged ‘1970’S’

new oily

Oily,

When I look at a photo of you I think of one word. Sexy Beast. More importantly what are your views on whether Scotland should become an independent McNation.

 Jock McJock, Jocktown

McOily Replies;

Hoots Mon!

This talk of Scottish independence reminds me of a true story about Sean Connery. True in the sense that I am making it up as I go along. In 1971 Sean, George Best, Warren Beatty and I were at an 8 day Miss World Sexathon in Monte Carlo.

It was a sort of All You Can Eat buffet. And boy did we dine.

Sean told me he had very strong views on Scottish Independence, “Och aye laddie the noo. I get strongly criticised for no livin’ in shiteholes like Galashiels, but I’m fiercely patriotic. Sure I think they should build up that big wall an keep thon buggers oot. I love haggis n fried mars bar me. I have a sporran too. And bagpipes. I just prefer chasin’ skirt aroond the world likesay ya ken ya f**kin  ****. Now wheres thon Miss Thailand?”

Yes, I too worried how he morphed into Begbie from Trainspotting before my very eyes. But such was the hedonism of those days!

Scotland still has a lot of oil. Nice………….

 McOily

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The 70’s Classic……..A disco dancing chicken and a whole lot more…..apparently Led Zeppelin were going to write the sound track. But didn’t.

 

 

 

 

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Todays request comes from Sean Smithson the hilarious Office Inbetweener – which you can read here!

Sean asked for  an image of Ali v Frazier at a weigh-in relating to one of their Titanic clashes in the 70’s.  Sadly we couldn’t find a suitable one.

Instead we bring to your attention the lesser known fact that during the Thriller in Manila, Frazier to goad Ali strapped a freshly roasted chicken to his head. The bobbin’ carcass infuriated Ali to such an extent that the “Greatest” took revenge in Round 8 with a furious assault of punches that were it not for the chinstrap, would have seen the first orbit of the Earth by a roast chicken.

 

Upon seeing the demolition of Frazier and his poultry, George Foreman had second thoughts about a rematch of the Rumble in The Jungle. The fight which would have been known as the “Barbecue in Timbuktu” instead afforded Foreman the idea of his now famous Low Fat Grill. As Foreman said at the time “There was no way I was going to take a lickin, so decided instead to grill my chicken.”

 

The rest as they say is history.

IS THERE ANYBODY OR ANYTHING YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE ATTACHED TO A SAUSAGE?

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new oily

Oily,

When I look at a photo of you I think of one word. Sexy Beast. More importantly what are your views on whether Scotland should become an independent McNation.

 Jock McJock, Jocktown

McOily Replies;

Hoots Mon!

This talk of Scottish independence reminds me of a true story about Sean Connery. True in the sense that I am making it up as I go along. In 1971 Sean, George Best, Warren Beatty and I were at an 8 day Miss World Sexathon in Monte Carlo.

It was a sort of All You Can Eat buffet. And boy did we dine.

Sean told me he had very strong views on Scottish Independence, “Och aye laddie the noo. I get strongly criticised for no livin’ in shiteholes like Galashiels, but I’m fiercely patriotic. Sure I think they should build up that big wall an keep thon buggers oot. I love haggis n fried mars bar me. I have a sporran too. And bagpipes. I just prefer chasin’ skirt aroond the world likesay ya ken ya f**kin  ****. Now wheres thon Miss Thailand?”

Yes, I too worried how he morphed into Begbie from Trainspotting before my very eyes. But such was the hedonism of those days!

Scotland still has a lot of oil. Nice………….

 McOily

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Somebody asked to see Borg and McEnroe in poultry poses again – happy to oblige!

YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS!

Somebody asked to see the Pope with a pork pie on his head image again – happy to oblige!

Pope Pius 23rd
 

Somebody asked to see the ginger Sphinx image again – happy to oblige!

Wonder what it makes of it all?

Somebody asked to see the ginger Al Jolson image again – as always happy to oblige!

jolson

Somebody asked to see the cute Polar Bear image again – as always happy to oblige!

polarbear

Somebody asked to see the Shane McGowan dancing in Riverdance image again – as always happy to oblige!

Somebody asked to see the Saturday Night Fever Disco Chicken again – as always happy to oblige!

Somebody asked to see Ali with a chicken on his head again – as always happy to oblige!

He Was Forty Years Ahead Of His Time

Somebody has asked to see Nelson Mandela with a walnut whip on his head again – as always happy to oblige!

Lovely

has asked to see the David Niven With A Wagon Wheel On His Head Image again – as always happy to oblige!

A Sad End To A Great Career

Last week somebody asked to see Picasso smoking his fishfingers……What a strange world we live in.

By The End He Was On 20 A Day
 

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OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

Dear Aunty Bill,

Recently, shoplifting in my local Oxfam, I came across the debut LP by those seminal rockers The Edgar Winter Group. I hurried home in a state of high dudgeon looking forward to blasting out “Frankenstein” and “Free Ride” and enjoying a few glasses of Sanatogen Tonic wine.

You can imagine my disappointment when on returning home and slipping the LP from its cover out comes a copy of Bernie Winters flop 1972 album “Here’s Bernie!”

Where do I stand in relation to the Sale of Goods Act( 1979) and the Misselling of Goods Act (1979).

Tooth Stained Rocker, Waltham Abbey

Aunty Bill Replies;

Dear Tooth Stained Rocker,

I understand your disappointment (and overlooking your reprehensible actions) it’s not all bad.

Whilst his brother Mike and his dog, Schnorbitz ventured to LA and made a fortune from blancmange (their potato and Bonio surprise was light years ahead of its time), Bernie remained in the UK to endlessly repeat his catch phrases of “I’ll Smash Yer Face In” and ”Choochy Face” .

It was during this period he recorded “Here’s Bernie!” a moribund collection of songs celebrating mediocrity. Here is the theme tune for you to listen to if you dare!

Not easy listening but on closer inspection a metaphor for life. You may enjoy “One size fits all” a melancholic tale of forgetting to turn the gas off before going on holiday.

Who could fail to be moved by the Dylanesque undercurrent of “She was only the Admiral’s daughter but her naval base was always full of sea men”, a tale of unrequited love amongst the press ganged lovers of double entendres.

This could be the best shoplifting mistake you ever made.

Ahoy There Me Hearties!

Aunty Bill

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Who Loves Ya!

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