Famous Gingers

Below you will find a selection of famous ginger people. We use the term famous in the loosest sense.

If you have any candidates for selection please feel free to let us know!

1. Bruce Forsyth

The legendary light entertainer who cannot sing, dance or play the piano properly but that doesn’t stop him. We honour Brucie for his bravery in sporting the most famous ginger syrup in the land and want to know whether he “gives it a twirl” at night.

Things about La Forsyth that may be of interest;

• He is a keen cyclist
• He has outsourced his catchphrase development to a barber’s in Quanding province in China
• He is allergic to dishwashers
• He invented the conveyor belt specifically for The Generation Game

Didn’t he do well!

2. Winston Churchill

Keeper of the flame haired dream for all the world in the dark days of the rise of Nazism and Hitler’s jackbooted trampling of Europe  from 1939 to 1945. What is less well known about Winston is that post war after his famous “Iron Curtain” speech in 1946 he set about doing things to bring the peoples of Europe closer together. Specifically he invented;

• The European Union
• The Eurovision Song Contest (and would have been the UK’s first entry were it not for a dose of phlebitis the night before transmission)
• It’s a Knockout’s pan European brother, “Jeux Sans Frontiere”.
• Sacha Distel
• The Internet

So through politics, music and the Fil Rouge – Churchill’s feats live on and here at gingerfightback we think that is quite an achievement.

3. Vincent Van Gogh

Great painter, intense brushstrokes and the use of colour that would make a northerner smile. Mad as a box of Cox’s pippins on a day trip to the cider farm, but who cares? Lesser known facts about Vincent include;

• As the name suggests,  he invented a light goods vehicle  – The Van
• He did a very good impression of Queen Victoria
• He was allergic to irony
• He wrote all of Shakespeare’s plays

So as we can see old Vince’s legacy will live on and here at gingerfightback we are seeking to establish if there is any truth in the rumour that he is not dead and lives in a roadside café with Elvis, Shergar and Princess Diana in southern Alabama. Vincent does the washing up apparently.

4. Jesus

The picture below proves Jesus was ginger. Further proof, if required can be seen in Jesus of Nazareth, the seminal biopic of his life, where old Robert Powell sports a fine ginger disposition. Great bloke, sadly misunderstood by a few and a couple of lesser known facts about him are;

• He once had a trial with Leicester City Football Club
• He invented the question mark before the exclamation mark!
• His loves avocado
• He charges five pounds for a signed photo

So Jesus, a great all round entertainer is perhaps the most important famous ginger for us to consider. There is a book to be published entitled  “Was Jesus a Ginger?” written by Herman Souk, astrologer and soothsayer to the court of Bhutan.

5. Marilyn Monroe

Screen siren and hero of the Bobsleigh, Marilyn captured the world’s hearts with a series of outstanding medical discoveries in the late nineteenth century. Forced to hide her gingerness to achieve fame as a movie legend, Marilyn also inspired the invention of Kleenex in 1954. Lesser known facts about Marilyn include;

• She loved apple crumble with loads of cinnamon
• She was the first person to become fluent in Esperanto
• She had an affection for water bowsers and had a collection of over sixty at the time of her death
• Her nickname for JFK was “ich been ein philanderer”

6. Gina G

Oooh err just a little bit, so goes the words of the classic europop song that propelled Gina to obscurity a few years ago. She is in fact a quantum physicist who discovered quarks and the twenty seventh moon of Jupiter. So surprising really that she should sing the little ditty that nearly gave Britain back its rightful place at the top of the Eurovision pile only to be cruelly denied by ballot rigging amongst those pesky ex-commies in eastern Europe. Lesser known fact about Gina are;

• There are none

7. Queen Elizabeth the First

Good Queen Bess, scourge of the Spanish, lover of liquorice and a right good laugh by all accounts. Daughter of Henry “Big Fella” the Eighth but we won’t hold that against her here at fightback, oh boy no. Did much to cement the place of the orange in British society and laid the foundations four hundred years in advance of the nation’s motorway system. Lesser known facts about  QE1  include;

• She liked a bit of ruff
• She cheated at cards but woe betide anyone who…..
• She invented the ocean liner and had the gall to name one after herself
• She smoked twenty roll ups a day and invented the first government health warning on her packet of shag

8. Elton John

Genius songwriter, tunesmith and all round good egg. Not quite in the Brucie league when it comes to syrups, but we at fightback think that Elton has a firm grip on second place. Although be careful with that candle in the wind Elt me old mucker. Lesser known facts about Elton include;

• He likes shredded wheat for breakfast, dinner and tea
• He remains undefeated world champion at Kerplunk
• He can ululate for three hours non stop (on a good day)
• He has all of Daniel O’Donnell’s albums signed by the great man himself

9.  Lassie

Not just a dog folks but a screen legend right up there with Steven Seagal in fightback’s opinion. Fluent in several languages and played a central part in brokering peace between Israel and Egypt in 1977. Barked herself horse to warn people of the dangers of drink and who listened? That’s right gingerfightback did and look where it got us, tired, lonely, hungry….enough,enough of self pity – here are some more facts about Lassie.

• She Directed Aliens 2
• She is a follower of Zen Buddhism
• She has no fear of heights
• She prefers cat food to dog food

Capturing the Essence of Gingerness a Ginger Dog and a Ginger Boy

10. The Cigarette Butt

We at gingerfightback are controversial if nothing. Perhaps the most ubiquitous ginger item in the world. Litter, cancer, olfactory displeasure and that horrible taste when you swig a can of cheap lager at a party to realise that somebody has dropped a butt in. But we have thought long and hard about this and consider the butt deserves a place at the top table of gingerness. Inanimate most certainly but lesser known facts include;

• Butts have been involved in  more post coitus conversations than anything else on the planet
• Butts have caused more children to gag involuntarily after their first one than even the first illicit can of cider in the park
• Butts have been at the centre of the search for happiness in France
• You cannot beat a pint and a fag

A cigarette butt meeting its solitary end

11. Postman Pat

 

Beloved Children’s TV programme in dear old Blighty.”Early in the morning etc etc”If there is a better advert for the benefits of organised postage stamp lickage, we at GFB have yet to find one. Now over his drink and drug fuelled years (Hence the baleful nickname Postman Crack) which was so honestly dealt with in his autobiography “Postman Pat – Saddle Sore But Still Deliverin'”, Pat is currently in the studio recording a Prog Rock concept album, using only the sounds of letters popping through letter boxes and the purring of his faithful cat, Thingy. Pat and his third wife Demi Moore are said to be very happy together.

Primal Scream’s #1 Fan

Some things you may not know about Pat;

• He is allergic to manila envelopes
• He supports the Boston Red Sox rounders team
• He loves Battenburg cake

12. The Orangutan

Lovely big monkey hanging out of the trees in the rain forests of Borneo. Rumoured to be able to speak Latin, Greek with a working knowledge of Spanish. The hitherto unreported colony in Nantucket were the backbone of the 19th Century whaling fleet (there is the phrase in Moby Dick  – “There blows a humpback – ginger gibbons to your boats!”)  So succesful were they in this role that the US Army in WW2 experimented with them as inconspicuous weapons carriers in the Pacific Theatre. Sadly Greek speaking apes were a bit of a give away and the Army decided to drop the idea. Shame as it would have made a nice role for Errol Flynn/John Wayne in a B/W war movie, “The Monkey Warriors of Mindanao” which never made the big screen. But it would have been good in our opinion.

Et Tu Brutus?

Some things you didn’t know about Orangutan

• They were a source of inspiration for Oscar Wilde
• Put three in a room together and they will solve any mathematical conundrum you throw at them
• They love the songs of Cliff Richard

13. Captain James “T” Kirk

“It is acting Jim, but not as we know it” – the famous unuttered line from Star Trek, by  Scotty about William Shatner’s ham performances, earning the Shat the soubriquet “Porker Shatner” – and today has revealed itself in an altogether more physical form.

Kirk, the bewigged Red Hair slayer of alien nations and proto model for man made fibres was truly a man ahead of his time by at least three weeks. Who can ever forget his opening line in the episode entitled “Planet Nylon and the Curse of Sweat Rash” when our hero is teleported to Planet Nylon and exclaims “Bones, get down here immediately me grapes are giving me awful gip”.

Televisual Gold

A man for our times

14. Gingivitis

Gum disease is a terrible affliction – and boy oh boy the Gingerfightback Orthodontics Trust has its work cut out to find a cure for Rum Gums. Still that won’t stop us. The leading expert in this field Mulrooney Dystemper MD (what a mouthful!) has explored the gnashers of millions of sufferers and has finally published his theses on this tricky subject. Entitled  “Peridontal Inflammation and Necrotization – A pop up guide” we urge all of you to nip out and buy a copy.

We think he should have a plaque outside his house.

Floss My Children, Floss

Some things you may not know about Gingivitis

• Very common amongst Republican US Presidents
• If you tell someone on a first date you suffer from it – don’t expect to see them again
• Mastication will not make you go blind

 

15. Cilla Black“Our Cilla” – bucked tooth singer and national treasure with a lorra lorra fans still. Gave the world a glimpse of her Liverpudlian upbringing in songs such as “A Professional Scouser I La” and who could forget her 1965 smash “A Shrill Warbling Carrot Top From Liverpool I La”.TV hasn’t been the same without her.

That’s what I call a Spray Tan

Some things you didn’t know about Cilla;

• She has the same Genetic make up as the Mersey Ferry
• She was in the Beatles
• She doesn’t like talking about her Liverpudlian upbringing
• Her knees are double jointed

16. The Sunset

Just one word to describe it. Lovely. Aaaaaah could stare at this image all day. Gingerish delight or what!

Calm thoughts, nice thoughts

Some things you don’t know about the Sunset;

• It never happens in the morning
• Without it we wouldn’t have night time – most of us would be knackered
• Bono claims to have created it
• Charlie Sheen had a fight with it a few weeks ago

17. Bachman Turner Overdrive

Canadian Ginger Rockers, whose signature tune, “You ain’t seen nothing yet,” is claimed to be a direct attack on Stevie Wonder.

In their day you could hear the words

Some things you don’t know about BTO;

• Turner left in 1976 and they became BO which was unfortunate
• Boy George was their lead singer in a failed comeback tour in 2008
• Bachmann makes a lovely seafood risotto

18. Thomas O’Malley

Crooning Kitty from Disney animated classic The Aristocats. Rumoured to have dated Princess Margaret in 1972. Turned down a role in Bed Knobs and Broomsticks on the advice of his spiritual advisor, Richard Nixon.

Is he singing a BTO song I wonder?

Some things you didn’t know about O’Malley “The Alley” Cat;

• Loves to trampoline
• Was a close friend of Bob Hope
• Hopes to land the role of Bodie in the movie version of the 70’s crime series The Professionals (although we think he is more suited to the role of Doyle)
• Can speak Latin