Oily
There is a squeak on my wardrobe door. Every time I open the door my pet Budgie goes into a catatonic state.
I’ve tried a wide range of ungents, moisturisers and gels all to no avail.
Will you pop in and see me to use your abundant reservoirs of natural emulsifiers to quieten the darn door and give my Budgie the peace she craves and deserves?
Ariadne, Ullapool
Hello Ariadne
I will slip by anytime to check on your wardrobe door.
I have a vast array of elixirs and pungent purifying potions which will need to be applied on the hinges of your wardrobe doors, and locks. And your buttocks. That should do the trick. Whilst there maybe I can tell you about the new company I am setting up, Long and Hard Productions.
Looking for a new PA and I feel you will fit the bill perfectly.
Squeakily yours
Oily
gingerfightback.wordpress.com 
Is this company a subsidiary of Short and Soft which I believe was the last venture.
They are an off shoot so to speak John (On another matter are you having trouble with receiving email updates from the blogs you follow? I haven’t received any for quite a few days now – yours included)
No, things seem normal. Go to your follow list in reader and make sure you have selected the e-mail options. Sometimes things can get reset to default.
Cheers John
Oily, you are one of the sweetest men I have ever heard of. Always there for the ladies in distress. Keep the sweetness coming until the whole world is covered with joy.
He just spurts love doesn’t he Wally
“And your buttocks” <– I nearly choked on my coffee reading that sentence. 🙂
I know it is pure poetry Nancy
Dear Oily, ever the entrepreneur. Will his variety of elixirs and potions ever come stateside?
No
Oily is such a problem solver … after all, others may not have addressed the buttocks as the issue.
He covers every angle Frank
Such a humanitarian.
We are lucky to have him
A true prize for the UK.
Indeed Frank
That man can solve any problem, as long as he can keep one hand free.
That is more difficult than you think!