Dear Aunty Bill,
I love my next door neighbour. He is no oil painting (most people who see him have a gag reflex) but I cannot stop thinking about him and his train set. He has a scale version of London Kings Cross station in his back garden.
I was thinking of getting him something for his train set as a way to break the ice as it were.
What would you suggest?
Emily, Bashley
Aunty Bill Replies;
Dear Emily,
This takes me back to the days when I had a train set.
Dad was seldom home so we had to run round the garden making train noises and wearing baseball hats pretending we were Casey Jones.
My “Uncle Des” insisted we wore baseball hats and nothing else, he said it was more “authentic”. Never saw Casey Jones with his overalls off though.
Anyway, pigeons would be the ideal icebreaker for your train loving heart-throb. He can place them around his garden to add authenticity. Chuck in some stale bread rolls, a half eaten bag of Cheesy Wotsits and scatter vomit in the raised beds to provide a true diet of the London pigeon.
To add an even greater air of Dickensian squalor, ensure that some of the flock should have a missing leg, eye or even a wing that doesn’t flap properly.
Pigeons healthy and deformed, are widely available and will really set the scene. He will love you forever!
Coo Coo! Choo Choo!
Aunty Bill
gingerfightback.wordpress.com 
Aunts Bill always has such unique answers! Authenticity will take that train set to a whole new level.
The depths!
She is lucky it is a train set. If the neighbour liked aeroplanes, pigeons, as Aunty so rightly suggested, may not have done the trick. Can you imagine a pigeon with a broken wing gamely trying to keep up with an Airbus at thirty thousand feet?
Gamely would be the word! Game pie maybe the outcome
I understand once it travels through those blades on the wings of an Airbus, a pie may be wishful thinking.
Yuk
An answer I would never divine without Aunty’s help…..
Here to serve Andra!
Maybe she could borrow a commuter to run across the platforms aswell?
Certainly Joe!
on 2nd thoughts, he might take umbrage into his train set being smashed up
I’d pay to see that
I best leave the advice to Aunty
And perhaps a rat – oh, not to scale – perhaps a little roach/beetle instead painted grey with a tail and ears glued on? Working together on tiny projects might be just the ticket.