Hello Folks,
My name is Terry Cotter. I’m a potter.
I have been potterising for nearly two decades now. I stock a wide range of ceramic goods in my shop The Potter’s Reel, down here in Lower Swell. The shop is named after my potter’s wheel which goes round and round. Like a reel.
We are getting ready for the Christmas rush. Are you?
Here are some reviews of some of my favourite bits from the world they call “Art”.
1. Painting
The Hay Wain – Constable’s most famous painting. I always thought he was a Policeman. It threw me for a while when my mate told me he wasn’t.
2. Movies
Die Hard – A bloke wearing a vest kills the bloke who played a wizard in Harry Potter. He can’t have been much of a wizard if he lets a bloke in a vest kill him. Goes on a bit.
3. Music
Saturday Night Fever – The Bee Gees were reborn with this album. I had a fever on Saturday Night. Went to the pub without drying my hair properly after a bath. Caught a chill. Goes on a bit (the album that is – not my fever – otherwise I wouldn’t be writing this).
4. Ballet
The Nutcracker – Big thighed lads prance about for some reason, whilst thin girls stand on tippy toes twirling. Then they finish. Roughly at the same time. Goes on a bit.
5. Poetry
Flute Notes From A Reedy Pond – Sylvia Plath ditty, “Hourly the eye of the sky enlarges its blank” – I haven’t a clue either.
Village News
We’ve been informed that shampoo is now in store in Spar. Next to tinned fish. Which I am assured is Dolphin Friendly.
‘Til next time – The Wheel Keeps On Turning!
TCTP
You need your bumps felt, Terry, as my old grannie used to say.
You’ve probably been there, done that though. No need to explain … no, really, definitely no need.
It went on for a bit
Looking forward to Terry’s avant-garde piece celebrating and combining the twin joys of Saturday Night Fever and The Nutcracker.
Will he be wearing a leisure suit and festive hat while he spins them?
All together now….”Nut Fever, Nut Fever, We’re gonna have to show it…..”
If that song gets stuck in my head the rest of the day, I will reply in kind by playing the three volume album of “David Frost Sings the Yugoslavian Love Songs of his Youth” at your pub.
Non stop.
I’ll make the booking now then!
I’m looking for a plant pot, in terrracotta about 10inches in height. They had none in Ladbrokes and they suggested I try you
A couple in the kiln now actually – I have one with Nick Clegg’s face on. £23.65.
Can you giftwrap that and we have a deal
Done!
Brilliant!
Ta Lass!