Britain’s top Boy Band, No Direction, have revealed to Gfb that their new single “Energy Price Rise Hike Stomp (The Freeze To Death Remix) is set to top the Charts.
The band, currently in Manchester evicting disabled people from their homes, are confident that their new folky sound will win over new fans. As David “Cotswold Bladder” Cameron explained, “We love Mumford and Sons, waistcoats, beards and banjos! So it is Hey nonny nonny ja ja nonny – old chap! Shoot that serf please Fotheringham. Stoke the Aga as well.”
The band’s spokesman George “Charlie Up De ‘Ooter” Osborne, said “We are really excited about this single. It’s really ballsy. Not like that fat prole Ed Balls though. I hate him. He smells. And he’s fat. Wanna buy a nuclear power station?”
The band’s manager Simon Cowell, who recently calmed the Oceans by raising his right eyebrow was quoted as saying “My pants are full of poo such is my excitement around this single. Must go, The Dalai Lama needs some advice on inner peace.”
Is it wrong to prefer Simon Cowell as a ginga?
No Angela just sick!
Evicting people, nuclear power plants, inner peace – can’t get more folksy that that!
Aw shucks!
Tell us how you really feel about David Cameron! LOL!
I’ve taken quite a liking to reading the Guardian UK and I’m slowly developing a new vocabulary! Who knew the English language could be so colorful! “Stoke the aga.” I’m not at all sure what that means, but I’m thinking perhaps it’s not a phrase I should throw around without mixed results. 🙂
Don’t worry Debra it is a posh stove!
Ha! Look how you have influenced my mind! I took an odd flight of fancy! 🙂
Fly fly me deario!
This was the Simon Cowell who told Chuck Norris he had no talent at anything?
Yup
Saint Simon is the one for inner peace. Nice chest doo Simon (Is it real?)
Absolutely (sort of)
Referring to a previous comment here – wouldn’t it be fun to watch Chuck Norris kick Simon’s arrogant butt?
Cowell would have Chuck!
Is it true that Bob on the Pot has seen a vision of Simon Cowell becoming the next Dalai Lama?
Every last word Frank! A deity with the X factor
Wow … hope Bob posts about it.
He is indisposed at the moment!
Understandable.